I never kiss and tell

It blows my mind that I remember when Jessica was born ... that I changed her diaper, and read stories to her, and marvelled when she learned how to laugh, and painted her face for halloween when she was toddling around Port Moody dressed as a fairy ballerina ... with the tu-tu on her head. I am SO AMAZED that this little person that I remember is able to call me and have an entirely intelligent phone conversation with me. That sounds so strange, but I can't believe that we grow up to be coherent, intelligible adults. Even my little sister. I am so proud of her ... not for the phone conversation, but just in general. My heart bursts for her and Hannah, and I feel so sad that I'm not around to watch them grow up, and share in all of their milestones with them. I told Jessi that I'd come and see her shows this year - seeing that kid onstage is like looking in a mirror, 'cause we're growing up to be remarkably similar. I can't wait to get home this weekend, put on my jammies and have a heart to heart with my sister, who is on the verge of becoming a young woman. It makes me feel old ... but in a good way. She's grown, and I've grown too.

Steve ... (I said his name!) is a masterpiece. I have a feeling that tomorrow is going to consist of a stress-filled and exhausting day, followed by a magical evening. I can't wait to see him. I can't wait to kiss him (okay, okay - I'm blushing!). Most of all? I can't wait for this to get better and better. I'm so surrounded by it, and I've got nothing but amazing things to look forward to in the next month - home, sleep, good food, working out with my mom, seeing my sisters, being in Vancouver, seeing Adam, and falling more and more for the most incredible specimen of a human being that I have ever come across.

I just need to finish my essay. Did I mention that? I'm working on it - I've got 1200 words left ... so I'm pretty much 1/3 done. It's going to be okay! I just can't wait to get off the bus, and see him smiling at me ... I'll be a disaster, but in a good way. In the best way.

Back to the paper, as much as I hate it. It's one step closer to getting out of here, and seeing S.