and we'll all float on anyway

I am obsessed with the song float on by Modest Mouse in the most unhealthy of ways. It came on while I was shopping in a jewelry store today, and I started to rock out, and I do mean ROCK OUT. I had my eyes closed, was singing, shaking my arms awkwardly, I even laid down a decent beat on the air drums. I got a "look" from a girl who was clearly not a day older than 13 (and should she really be wearing clothes like that?), and I grinned back, stupidly. I don't even embarass myself anymore, and that's probably a bad sign. Man, that song messes me up like it's some sort of drug and lately I can't get enought of it.

I've been feeling really motivated lately. REALLY motivated. We're talking ambitious beyond my usual go-get-'em attitude that I try to pull off, and I think it has something to do with the fact that I've been sleeping on a regular schedule (well, regular for me at least). I want to get stuff done during the day and I'm excited to do it. This is very new for me - usually I want to sleep during the day. When I think about it, I can't imagine how much my body must hate me right now, for what I've put it through over the last four years. I'm sorry body - we're almost done. And then we can go back to playing soccer, sleeping and eating raw veggies after school, just like the good old days.

I don't feel very thoughtful tonight, in case you couldn't tell - this is about the most bland blog I've ever written (even by my standards, and let me reiterate that I bore myself to tears). I had a fantastic conversation with a very sleepy-and-therefore-affectionate Steve before he passed out for the night (god bless the time change), and he put my entire day into perspective. I feel, for once, completely content. I can't describe how warm my whole heart feels, like I'm about to burst from something. I feel real and genuine and alive and radiant and excited about tomorrow, and the tomorrows after that. I feel interesting - and find him equally fascinating. Talk about drugs - one Stephen Johns is making me fly. Tonight, I don't want to think, don't want to talk and don't have anything interesting to say - I am content just to be thinking about him.

I know. Call me whipped. Call me love-sick. Call me crazy...but you can't argue that I'm damn happy too.

(blog fades out, as Float On swells to a booming crescendo .... alright/already/we'll all float on/alright/don't worry/we'll all float on...)