Fat Guts Gets Poked

Steve and I just got off the phone, after having had a conversation about the insanity of his friend Jon's mom (and I hope, now, that Jon will never lay eyes on this blog. Sorry, Jon, but your mom is scary). Steve mentioned that Jon's girlfriend must really adore him, because having a family like that would be hard to handle. I agreed - when you date someone seriously, and moreso when you make a commitment to another person, you're inadvertantly making a commitment to their family. As awful, wonderful or creepy as they are (honestly - who stays up until 3am just to make sure that their 25 year old son is tucked in?) - they become yours.

This just in. My family is WEIRD. I came home after a long day of work, and 4 hours later (I'm SO out of it), noticed the following scene taking place on my pillows:












In case you aren't familiar with the usual suspects, this here is a picture of Seth the Sloth (my beloved beanie baby) taking the anal virginity of Fat Guts, the long-distance representation of my boyfriend Steve. Fat Guts doesn't appear to be complaining about getting 'tail from a Sloth - he is quite comfortable stretched out with his face pressed into my pillow. My stuffed animals are big sluts and my mom is a total nut.

So I was thinking that this might be Steve's clue to start taking baby steps away from me and my filthy family. I can't imagine Marilyn Johns ever sneaking into Steves room and setting up lewd and suggestive poses of the Randy Moss and Daunte Culpepper figurines on Steve's bed. But then I remembered that my quote unquote 'normal' boyfriend prefers to pose for pictures in the following manner:












And I decided that he's probably not so normal after all. Look at how his little nose peeks out from his teeshirt! I think I'll keep him.

And yes, I'll write a normal entry, eventually.